Some people have asked for the list of words that I check during my final edit, so here it is. I don’t eliminate all the words, but I do go through the manuscript and check the usage of each instance of these words to see if I can delete them or rewrite the sentence to get rid of them (particularly in the case of was, were, and had). The problem with some of these words, though otherwise acceptable, is that if you use too many of them, it gives your book a wishy-washy feel. Words like quite, rather, almost, mostly, somewhat, suppose, guess all blunt the edge of your prose. If you can eliminate them, do.
If you have any words to add to the list, feel free to suggest them. Though you do know, don’t you, I will never forgive you for adding to my woes? Foremost on my list of people to never forgive is Deborah J. Ledford, author of the soon-to-be-published novel Staccato. She’s the one who brought “was” to my attention, as well as the suggestion to eliminate colons and semi-colons in dialogue. (Seems to me I need to add “She’s the one who” to the following list. A bit wordy, that.)
I feel good about sharing this list from hell. Now I don’t have to suffer alone.
a little |
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can’t help but |
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was |
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just |
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up |
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were |
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solely |
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down |
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that |
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only |
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begin to |
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is all |
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simply |
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start to |
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though |
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merely |
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always |
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matter |
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particularly |
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never |
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completely |
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practically |
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almost |
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extremely |
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a bit |
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rather |
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totally |
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really |
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quite |
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thoroughly |
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kind of |
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very |
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absolutely |
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barely |
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somewhat |
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basically |
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real |
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end up |
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especially |
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hardly |
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off of |
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: (in dialogue) |
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at least |
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there was |
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; (in dialogue) |
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mostly |
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it is |
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because |
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felt |
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seemed |
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use to (s/b used to) |
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off of |
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ever |
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come up with |
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even |
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anyway |
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by the way |
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however |
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perhaps |
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at the very least |
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suddenly |
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in spite of |
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the fact that |
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although |
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all of a sudden |
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if nothing else |
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already |
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tried to |
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a matter of fact |
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you know |
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all the while |
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I guess |
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take a look |
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truly |
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suppose |
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fairly |
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besides |
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awhile |
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actually |
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had |
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it (clarify) |
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Bertram's Blog 
June 13, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Some other ones I picked up: up and down. You don’t need to say stand “up”. “He stood.” “He sat” (no need for down. The directions are superfluous. Also everyone says “once again.” again means=once more, so every time you write “once again” you are saying “once once more.” I also do a serach for “ing” to get rid of as many passive progressive tenses as possible. And let’s not forget all those unnecessary speaker tags…
October 21, 2009 at 10:51 am
I’d beg to differ in the direction issue. He “stood” implies the guy has been standing while something else was going on. And he “stood up” means he performed an action – that of lifting his – er – pelvis from the chair. Same goes for the “sit” thing. She sat “down” implies she dropped herself on a chair / on the grass. If I hear someone “sat” I’d understand she has been in that position for quite a while.
October 21, 2009 at 11:02 am
Good points. Just goes to show that one shouldn’t be too quick to delete the ups and downs.
June 14, 2009 at 10:50 am
Here’s my list of “boring” verbs. Using these verbs is a good sign you’re telling instead of showing.
ex:
She began to cry=> She cried/wept/Tears flowed
He took a look=> He glanced/studied/inspected
The bomb went off=> The bomb detonated/exploded/erupted
He heard her get dressed=>She dressed
is, isn’t, ain’t
was, wasn’t
were, weren’t
will, won’t
be, been, being
begin, begins, began, beginning
come, comes, come, coming
do, does, did, doing
don’t, doesn’t, didn’t
feel, feels, felt, feeling
get, gets, got, getting
give, gives, gave, giving
go, goes, went, going
have, has, had, having
hear, heard, hears, hearing
look, looked, looks, looking
make, made, makes, making
put, puts, putting
see, sees, saw, seeing
seem, seems, seemed, seemingly
took, taken, takes, taking
try, tried, tries, trying
but, suddenly, then, also, finally, at last
June 14, 2009 at 11:07 am
Ouch! More words to add to my list! At this rate, I could spend the rest of my life editing this one final manuscript. Thank heavens the others are already published or in the works.
June 14, 2009 at 2:29 pm
An excellent list from hell, thank you so much!
June 14, 2009 at 3:11 pm
Stop! This is meaningless pedantry. All of those words can be useful in the proper context.
I’d hate to see some beginning writer out there becoming obsessed with “find and replace” because they feel they must follow a list like the above.
Writing is about flow. Yes, some of those words might be an intrusion, but often they are not. Find and replace editing is the demon child of modern compositional tools. Shakespeare didn’t have it, nor Joyce, nor Vonnegut, nor a thousand other accomplished writers from the past. How did they edit? They read their manuscripts from start to finish. They looked for the flow of words from one sentence to the next, from one paragraph to the next, from one page to the next.
Unfortunately, there is no replacement for the time it takes to do this.
June 14, 2009 at 3:16 pm
True. All of these words may be perfectly fine and the “right” ones to use, but often we use them by default. This list is a tool, not a license to use “Find & Replace” just because they are there. Rather, it’s a chance to catch yourself and evaluate each use to see if there is a better word or way to write that sentence. My 2 cents.
June 14, 2009 at 4:40 pm
I don’t think it’s meaningless. I’m just saying it’s a tool, and for me, I’m simply taking a hard look at the use of these words, and considering if the sentences they’re used in can’t be improved. I’ve tried the “remove all adverbs and adjectives” trick and found that the prose gets a bit crazy without a few. I’ve tried the “remove was” and “remove -ing”, and some things are just hard to describe without them. And I’ve never used S&R for anything other than changing a place or character’s name. And I don’t even look at this stuff for dialog; that’s a whole other can of worms.
June 14, 2009 at 7:04 pm
I agree, iapetus, dialogue holds a completely different set of rules–much looser. We spend to say “was” and other passives in our speech, so in order to be conversational with written dialogue we must turn to a natural pattern when our characters speak. I tend to use a lot of gerunds (ing words), especially within action scenes.
June 14, 2009 at 7:28 pm
This is my list of words, ones I tend to overuse or words that others overuse. I don’t expect anyone else to follow the list. And, after editing my fourth book, I don’t intend to ever use it again, either. I’m a much better writer now than when I started, so the list isn’t that important any more. But this list taught me a lot about writing — for example, how to write more actively rather than passively, to look out for overused words, to make my writing sharper without using qualifying words like “quite.”
Flow is definitely important, but flow can’t tell you when you use too many justs or ups or downs or “end ups”. (Everyone in my novels “end ups” doing things. Don’t know why.) “Just” is so natural to us, it fits with the flow, so we don’t notice it. Perhaps it doesn’t matter if there are two or three hundred justs in a novel, but most are unnecessary, so why use them?
Well, back to the editing. Drats.
June 15, 2009 at 8:48 am
Great list, Pat. I’ve added a few to mine own some time ago. Yet, just the other day I was reading a best-seller and, you guessed it, the novel was full of words from your list. Didn’t stop the author from selling a few million copies. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. haha.
June 15, 2009 at 11:58 am
Aghghgh. Maybe I should stick to writing drabbles. At least keeping things down to 100 words ensures fewer entries from the list.
June 15, 2009 at 12:12 pm
I agree. This is a great list and a good tool.
It’s not about having a list of unwanted words that must be removed. It’s a writing tool to make sure you didn’t just say words like “the” 200 times in the past twenty paragraphs. (A quick “find” search on “the ” shows I have 1733 occurences of that very word just in chapter two, and it is not a huge chapter. Perhaps they are all necessary, or perhaps I was just hooked on the word “the”).
This tool can also be a good start when you have to trim the fat from a manuscript and tighten up your writing, but have no idea where to start reconsidering what you wrote. With practice, I expect that I (and other writers not experienced in hacking their writing down to please publishers) will improve and leave the list behind. In the meantime, thanks Pat for the list and the idea. I expect this will save me a lot of guess work and time spent staring blankly at the pages wondering where to start.
June 15, 2009 at 1:50 pm
Funny, but as I have been writing today, it seems the only words I can think of are the words ON your list, Pat.
June 15, 2009 at 3:24 pm
This list is a tool that can be used for good or for evil. I agree it’s way too easy for writers and their critique partners to obsess on the ‘forbidden’ words and ignore whether or not the words in question move the story along. It’s a balancing act.
June 15, 2009 at 3:28 pm
I also vote for began (added already above) and could.
Good list you have!
June 15, 2009 at 3:30 pm
Victoria Mixon posted a nice counter to this post here: http://victoriamixon.com/2009/06/15/helping-verbs-act
June 16, 2009 at 5:59 am
Most excellent ! I am such a novice and this list is gold for me 🙂
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