I seldom get past the first chapter of new books anymore. Too many authors eschew the traditional past tense, third-person limited point of view and write in the clunky present tense first person point of view. (Or a mixed bag, which is even worse) Too many try to write in a roundabout style rather than beginning at the beginning and continuing until the end. Then there is a weird undercurrent of . . . nastiness, perhaps, or maybe just uneasiness to most books nowadays. I don’t know if it has to do with the difference in young authors today (and “young” to me includes those who are in their middle years), with the difference in mores, with too much artificial intelligence help, with the difference in the new generation of acquisition editors. Or if it’s just me with my now outdated values. But whatever the reason, I haven’t enjoyed any book written after 2022. And not a lot before then, either.
Because of this, I no longer feel like looking for books at the library. I figure I’d perused those same shelves over 700 times since I’ve been here, and I just couldn’t search them anymore. Too many shelves are full of whole series of books I have no intention of reading —- the entire Patterson oeuvre, all of Stuart Woods’ books, all the popular romance authors, and dozens of others. Too many other shelves are full of books I’ve read or reread.
So I stopped going to the library. I never made the decision not to go, I simply didn’t go, which is weird.
Visiting the library had been a major part of my outside activities ever since I got here to this town. It was such a treat because there hadn’t been a library near where I lived in California, so I went years without reading much. (That doesn’t seem right. Maybe I bought books. I know I bought word puzzles magazines, wrote books, and went through the video tapes Jeff had collected, but it seems odd to think of not be as caught up in reading as I’d always been.)
I’ll finish this current reread of The Wheel of Time, reread the other few books I’ve collected, read the alchemy books inherited from my older brother, maybe read the books I wrote, and then . . . I don’t know. I’ll figure out something to do. I’ll have to — I’ve stopped going online except to blog or play a game for a little while because I simply don’t want to know what is going on anymore. Which leaves me a lot of free time!
It’s funny how different this year is. I used to agonize over any decision, and yet suddenly, here I am — blogging without ever having decided to blog daily, not going to the library without ever having decided to stop, staying away from news without ever having decided to do so. (Staying away from news was my New Year’s resolution, which lasted all of two weeks, and yet now, two months later, I’ve started honoring the resolution again.) Come to think of it, I never decided to do this current reread of The Wheel of Time either. I just did it.
This is a good time to make changes — with spring coming, I’ll be spending more time outside, and with nothing calling me back inside, maybe I’ll enjoy the work this year. (I didn’t last year. It just seemed to be too much trouble.)
Makes me wonder what other things I will start (or stop) doing without ever making a conscious decision. Should be interesting to see what life deals out.
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Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.
Bertram's Blog 
March 6, 2026 at 7:34 am
Like you I gave up reading novels. I read my scriptures and how to books because I feel I am learning something. Partially, the reason I gave up reading was that my children encouraged me to get rid of my library. When Cle was alive, I had a whole room full of books. Now a shelf and a half. If I find anymore books in unpaking, I will need to make choices.. Part of my problem is also that I need to have cataracts removed and to go along with that, I don’t trust doctors.
March 6, 2026 at 7:54 am
I’m with you on the distrust of doctors. I won’t get mine removed until I cannot see anymore. And even then, I’d think twice. And oh, so sorry about having to get rid of your personal library! Just another sadness to pile on top of all the rest.
March 6, 2026 at 9:50 am
Oh, the ones who won’t begin at the beginning and continue to the end drive me nuts. Books and movies both. Why go out of your way to make it hard for a reader to keep up?
In other news, right now I have plenty to read mostly because of long-time loyalty to authors like Anne Tyler. But if I outlive everybody I’m keeping up with, well…
March 6, 2026 at 10:24 am
I was never into Anne Tyler, but maybe I’ll rethink that. Thanks for the suggestion (even though it wasn’t a suggestion as such.)
March 6, 2026 at 9:56 am
From the movie Finding Forrester, in which Sean Connery plays an author more talented than either of us:
Jamal: You ever read your own book?
Forrester: ln public? Hell, no. I barely read it in private.
March 6, 2026 at 10:22 am
How funny! And wonderful.
March 6, 2026 at 11:31 am
Spontaneity appears in assorted aspects of my life now and I admit to embracing it. After a lifetime of doing and being what was expected of me and living to a schedule, it’s freeing not to. I hadn’t given any thought to whether I decided to be spontaneous, or if it just happened.
When it comes to reading, acquiring an eReader changed how I select books, and I rarely go to the library anymore, although just recently I did borrow Louise Penny’s GREY WOLF and BLACK WOLF. I wanted to read them but was reluctant to put out the extra $$$. Thinking about it though, I didn’t actually go into the library. I reserved the books online and my hubby picked them up when they became available.
When I got my kindle, I signed onto Bookbub and receive daily emailed suggestions in my chosen genre, many of them free. I read their descriptions and either select them or delete them. Hmmm, I guess that qualifies as decision making! 🙂 The offerings are rarely new titles, but with the exception of Penny’s, I’m not drawn to reading new books just because they’re new. I’m reading a more varied selection this way, but if something isn’t appealing to me, I no longer feel any compulsion to finish what I started, just click and delete…something that would have horrified me in my younger years.
One area where decision making *will* be necessary is in choosing new plants for our garden. I have to relocate a few hostas to less sunny locations and then decide what will replace them. That kind of decision making I like.
It’s 10:30 a.m. and my hubby just brought me a coffee. Morning coffee break has become a habit in retirement. Time to stop my rambling here and enjoy a cuppa.
March 6, 2026 at 1:51 pm
Does selecting or deleting ebooks count as decision making? It sounds more as if you’re going by instinct, which seems to a sort of spontaneity
I’m not even going to have to decide what plants to buy. The best ones for my hanging baskets and container gardens are petunias because they last a lot longer than other flowers and aren’t fried by the sun, so that’s what I’ll be getting. I have a lot of packets of seeds to sow when spring comes and I see holes in my garden, so unless something catches my attention, I probably won’t be buying much.
As for spontaneity — I’d forgotten, but before Jeff died he told me the one thing he regretted about the strictures of our lifestyle that his ill heath had demanded, was that I’d lost my spontaneity. I’d made an effort to be more spontaneous when I was on my own, but I forgot about that as my new life created strictures of a different sort (such as taking care of a house and all that entails). Besides, deciding to be spontaneous seems a bit of an oxymoron. So yay for being spontaneously spontaneous!