How Many Years Do You Have Left?

Sometimes research gets so bizarre and obtuse that the results seem meaningless. For example, Brazilian physician Claudio Gil Araujo came up with a test to predict how many years we have left.

The test was for 51 to 80 year olds, but so far I haven’t found anyone that age who could perform the test perfectly, not even the dancers I know. For the test, you’re supposed to stand in the middle of the room, cross your legs, then gracefully lower yourself into a cross-legged sitting position without using your hands, elbows, or knees. You get 5 points if you can get down into a sitting position. If you can do it but are clumsy, you lose a point. Every time a hand or knee touched the ground, you lose another point. Next, you’re supposed to stand up, legs still crossed, without any part of you touching the ground. This gains you another five points, but again, if you are clumsy, you lose a point. Every time a body part touches the ground, you lose a point.

The maximum is ten points. Araujo’s research indicated that if you score less than 8 points, you are twice as likely to die within the next five years as those who scored more than 8, and if you score less than 3 points, you are five times more likely to die.

According to these statistics, I should have been dead long ago. I have never in my life, except perhaps as a small child, been able to do simply cross my legs and sink gracefully into a cross-legged sitting position.

Beyond that, the parameters of the test were ridiculous — there is a vast difference in mortality and fitness, health and agility from the ages of 51 to 80. The test would have had more validity if it centered on a single age or at least narrowed the age grouping. 51 to 60, 61 to 70, 71 to 80. It should also have been divided by men and women.

A 51-year-old male has a .59% chance of dying within a year, and a 51-year-old woman has a .35% chance of dying. An 80-year-old man has a 6.16% chance of dying within a year, and an 80-year-old woman has a 4.39 chance of dying. Considering that as a rule men have shorter life expectancies, and 68% of the participants were men, the test results would have been skewed even further. Supposedly, they adjusted for such factors, but there was no indication of what those adjustments comprised. Besides, genetics is a huge factor. If one’s parents lived to a very old age, you have a better chance of doing so yourself regardless of your ability to sit crosslegged. (The test does not apply to those less than 50 since the results are vastly different.)

The way I figure, f you want to know how long you have left to live — just live life to the fullest, and one day you will arrive at the end. Then you will know.

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Grief: Yes, There is Hope

A woman whose husband died six months ago contacted me to say she’s reading Grief: The Great Yearning and is finding comfort from knowing that what she is feeling, others have felt. She mentioned that some things I wrote were identical to things she wrote in her journal, which goes to show that grief is individual, and yet much is the same when it comes to losing a husband or a soul mate. The pain goes down so deep, it hits places in our psyches we didn’t even know existed.

The woman asked how I was doing, then posed the question that haunted me for years: “Is there hope for me?”

It’s hard to believe, when you are lost in the cyclone called grief, that there will ever come a time of peace. Since I had no such belief, I held tight to the belief of others that the pain will ebb, that I will find renewal. TheCalifornia sunrisey kept telling me to be patient, that it takes three to five years, but around four years most people find a renewed interest in life. And so it is with me. I feel alive again. I still have an underlying sadness. I miss him, of course, and always will — I even cry for him occasionally, though the tears pass easily without lingering pain.

I am finding that certain songs, movies, days, memories, bring about an upsurge of grief, and apparently, from what others have experienced, this will be true for the rest of my life, but at least I feel as if I am alive. I felt disconnected from life for a long time, as if I too had died. And partly, that is true — the person I was when I was with him did die. But now I need to be the person I am when I am with me. I can no longer take him into the equation of my life. My being alive does not make his being dead any less significant, though oddly, his being dead does make my being alive more significant. I once loved deeply. I once was so connected to another human being that his death sent me reeling for years.

But now, I am me. Just me. Not a bad thing to be.

This change in me is obvious. I met someone on my walk today, someone I’d talked to sporadically over the past three and a half years. He stopped me, asked me how I became such a star. (Radiant, he meant.) He barely recognized me, even though I was wearing the same sort of comfortable and inelegant clothes I always wear when walking. In fact, he said at first he thought I was young enough to be my daughter. He hunched his shoulders forward to show me how I used to walk — like an old woman.

So yes, there is hope. If you’re still grieving or feeling unalive after suffering a significant loss, take heart. If I can find my way back to life, so can you. Just grieve, find comfort where you can, try new things, and be patient with yourself. The pain does ebb, and chances are, around the fourth or fifth-year anniversary, you will find a renewed interest in life. Until then, wishing you peace.

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

My Midnight Visitor

The title of this post isn’t entirely accurate. It wasn’t a midnight visitor, more like an evening visitor, but “midnight visitor” sounds mysterious, which is fitting for such a mysterious visitation. Besides, it seems apt for this Yule season.

Last night I visited with a friend who wants to start a blog to spread the word about her faith. She hadn’t realized I knew how to blog, and was delighted when I offered to send her a blog tutorial I had written and to help if she had questions. She told me it must have been God’s will for her to come see me, and I agreed. (Although my faith might be so weak as to be almost non-existent at times, I am always respectful of other people’s beliefs.) A minute or two later, I happened to look out the window. The sky was a bright, happy orange. I told her, “See, God likes the idea of your blogging.”

We laughed and hugged, then she went out to take photos and I went to get my camera. I was so excited by the sunset — I had never seen such a vivid sky — that I left the door to the patio wide open. When I went back inside, a bird was caroming all over the living room. I try to shoo it out, but it hid behind a sideboard. Yikes.

Birds in the house scare me. They’re not like bugs that you can capture in a bottle and either throw away or release outside. Birds are big and wild and alien and frightened. Once when a bat crawled through a half-inch space between the screen and the casement of an open window, we waited until it fell asleep clinging to the curtains, then we used a very large container to capture it. But last night’s bird was huge. Poor thing, it was as upset by the episode as I was. Even though the door was open, it didn’t seem to be able to find its way out. My friend suggested opening the door wider, and as I did, the bird must have caught a whiff of freedom, because he flew over my head and was gone.

All in all, a very colorful evening.

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” All Bertram’s books are published by Second Wind Publishing. Connect with Pat on Google+

Taking “Z” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

All this month, I’ve been taking with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twenty-sixth day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “Z” things.

I am especially grateful for:

zany hatZaniness. There is not enough zaniness in the world. There is plenty of idiosyncrasy and unconventionality, but these are so often serious choices and serious pursuits without the fun and amusement that are necessary for zaniness. Still, there is some zaniness in the world, for which I am grateful, and in the coming years, I will do my part to add to that zaniness, if by nothing else than my amusing hats.

Zebras. I am grateful for zebras and other mythical creatures. I call zebras mythical because although they are supposed to exist, I have never seen one. I’m not a big fan of zoos (another Z!) since I can’t bear to see anyone or anything caged, but I am grateful for zoos because someday, perhaps, I will be able to see such a beast.

Zeal. I am grateful that I can still muster up enough zeal to start such projects as this alphabet of gratitude.

Zenith. And I am grateful for the zenith (meaning culmination) of this project. I’m not sure I learned much from it, nor am I sure it made me any happier, but at least I pondered for a few minutes each day about what to take with gratitude. So many things for which to be grateful. Such a wonderful world!

Wishing you many zzzzzzs.

So what “Z” things are you taking with gratitude?

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See also:
Taking “V” Things With Gratitude, Taking “W” Things With Gratitude, Taking “X” Things With Gratitude, Taking “Y” Things With Gratitude

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Taking “Y” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

For the rest of November, I’m going to take with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twenty-fifth day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “Y” things.

I am especially grateful for:

Yellow. Such a lovely, sunny color that mostly shows it face in the flowers of spring or the changing leaves of autumn. It’s hard to be unhappy in the presence of yellow — yellow makes us optimistic and brings clarity of thought. (Hmmm. Makes we wonder if I need to get a yellow shirt or even a scarf since I don’t own anything yellow, though at one time it was my favorite color.) So, today, I will be looking for yellow, and taking whatever I find with gratitude.

Yesterday. We take yesterday for granted. What else can we do? Yesterday is gone. And yet, and yet . . . I am grateful for all my yesterdays, for where I’ve been, what I learned, who I loved.

Yes. In recent years, I have made a practice of automatically saying “yes” to any opportunity that might arise, which has taken me to so many wonderful places. I said yes to a trip to Seattle to see Shen Yun, said yes to speak at a writers’ conference at St. Simons Island, said yes to fairs and festivals, said yes to shows and classes, said yes to merry-go-rounds and Ferris wheels, said yes to bizarre experiences and enjoyable excursions. After years of a constrained lifestyle where I didn’t have the luxury of accepting invitations (which, to be honest, were few and far between), “yes” has changed my attitude. Someday, “yes” might even change my life. So, today I will take with gratitude that simple little word, “yes.”

Youthfulness. Although I am not really youthful in years, appearance, or even outlook, there is still in me a youthfulness of spirit — a willingness to embrace new things, an ability to look around me with wonder, a yearning for adventure. I am grateful for that youthful spirit, and looking forward to wherever it might take me.

So what “Y” things are you taking with gratitude?

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See also:
Taking “V” Things With Gratitude, Taking “W” Things With Gratitude, Taking “X” Things With Gratitude

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Taking “X” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

For the rest of November, I’m going to take with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twenty-fourth day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “X” things.

I am especially grateful for:

XX. There is a single page in my dictionary for X, so there’s not a lot of X things to take with gratitude. I could be grateful for X-ray machines (and I am when I need one, just not today). I could be grateful for xeriscaping, and I am — elder care is hard enough without adding lawn care to the duties. I could be grateful for xylophones, and I will be if ever I get one. So what “X” thing am I taking with gratitude today? Just that — X.

X marks the spot, and this spot — this blog — is something to take with gratitude. I’ve been blogging for more than six years, and daily blogging for more than two years, and still, I find comfort, companionship, caring, and contemplation here. So I am very grateful for this opportunity.

X stands for the unknown, and I am grateful for all the unknowns (unknown to me, that is) who stop by. And I’m grateful to those I have come to know by their comments. You have helped make me feel at home here, made me even feel wise at times.

I’m also grateful for the unknowns who helped prepare today’s meal. Since my 97-year-old father (who I am looking after) eats very little and since his idea of haute cuisine is Ensure, there was no reason to cook a holiday dinner from scratch, so I made it simple — rotisserie chicken, boxed stuffing, canned cranberry sauce, bottled gravy, bakery pumpkin pie, and yams. (Those I did cook — just plain yams, no carmelizing or marshmallowing). It was very good, actually, and the best part was that the whole things — the preparation, the meal, and the cleaning up — took little more than an hour, which leaves me the whole day to do . . . X. (Whatever that might be.)

So what “X” things are you taking with gratitude?

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See also:
Taking “A” Things With Gratitude, Taking “B” Things With Gratitude, Taking “C” Things With Gratitude,Taking “D” Things With Gratitude, Taking “E” Things With Gratitude, Taking “F” Things With Gratitude, Taking “G” Things With Gratitude, Taking “H” Things With Gratitude, Taking “I” Things With Gratitude, Taking “J” Things With Gratitude,Taking “K” Things With Gratitude, Taking “L” Things With Gratitude, Taking “M” Things With Gratitude, Taking “N” Things With Gratitude, Taking “O” Things With Gratitude, Taking “P” Things With Gratitude, Taking “Q” Things With Gratitude, Taking “R” Things With Gratitude, Taking “S” Things With Gratitude, Taking “T” Things With Gratitude, Taking “U” Things With Gratitude, Taking “V” Things With Gratitude, Taking “W” Things With Gratitude

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Taking “W” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

For the rest of November, I’m going to take with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twenty-third day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “W” things.

I am especially grateful for:

desert roadWalking. Today it is 44 months since my life mate/soul mate died. In 4 months it will be 4 years. Even though I can barely remember him and our shared life any more, I can still feel his absence, as if there is a void deep inside me. I don’t know how I made it this far, though the thousands of miles I have walked during the past 44 months have helped. Walking is my solace, my meditation, my inspiration, and in many cases, my transportation. (Not as much transportation as I would like — there are few stores within walking distance of where I am staying.) I am exceedingly grateful I am able to walk, particularly since so many people are denied this simple pleasure.

Weather. Although we never take weather for granted — we are so aware of the weather we are almost obsessed by it — we do take the fact of weather for granted. Whether rain or sun, blizzards or balmy breezes, there is always some kind of weather. Today I will take for gratitude whatever weather comes my way.

Water. We don’t take water for granted as we once did. We can’t drink from streams or creeks. In many cases, we can’t even drink from our faucets as we once did. There are territorial disputes over water, as in frontier days. And yet, as of now, we still have water to drink, even if it does come in dubious purified form from the grocery store, and that is something to take with gratitude. I will be drinking extra water today, giving thanks that potable water is still so abundant.

Wisdom. I don’t know how much wisdom there is in the world, or even how much wisdom I have, but today, I will be taking with gratitude whatever wisdom I find.

So what “W” things are you taking with gratitude?

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See also:
Taking “A” Things With Gratitude, Taking “B” Things With Gratitude, Taking “C” Things With Gratitude,Taking “D” Things With Gratitude, Taking “E” Things With Gratitude, Taking “F” Things With Gratitude, Taking “G” Things With Gratitude, Taking “H” Things With Gratitude, Taking “I” Things With Gratitude, Taking “J” Things With Gratitude,Taking “K” Things With Gratitude, Taking “L” Things With Gratitude, Taking “M” Things With Gratitude, Taking “N” Things With Gratitude, Taking “O” Things With Gratitude, Taking “P” Things With Gratitude, Taking “Q” Things With Gratitude, Taking “R” Things With Gratitude, Taking “S” Things With Gratitude, Taking “T” Things With Gratitude, Taking “U” Things With Gratitude, Taking “V” Things With Gratitude

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Taking “V” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

For the rest of November, I’m going to take with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twenty-second day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “V” things.

I am especially grateful for:

saladVegetables. Such a wide variety of produce is available to us, that we often take vegetables for granted, but they are a colorful, nutritious, and tasty part of our diet, and I am grateful for that.

Variety. No matter what definition of variety you pick, that kind of variety is an important part of life. 1) The quality or state of being different. 2) a collection of different sorts of things. 3) a type of something in the same general class. 4) a show consisting of various acts. Today I will take with gratitude a variety of varieties, and be thankful that there is so much diversity in the world.

Values. Values (or rather talk of values) seem only to be trotted out by politicians who are up for election, but we all have values — ideals and behaviors that are important to us and that we try to live up to, or things that mean something to us. I am truly grateful for everyone who values my words enough to read this blog.

Vocabulary. Speaking of words, I value my vocabulary — which, unfortunately, is not as large as it once was. Many words seem to have gotten stuck in the backwaters of my brain where I can’t retrieve them. Still, I have words enough to say what I need to say, and that is something to take with gratitude!

Vanity. Although vanity is defined as having excessive pride in one’s appearance, for the most part we now use vanity to mean simply an awareness of one’s appearance. Such an awareness remains with us to the end. Even the elderly, even people on their deathbeds want to look as good as possible. It seems to me such a desire is an admirable thing, a triumph of the human spirit, and should be taken with gratitude.

So, what “V” things are you taking with gratitude.

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See also:
Taking “A” Things With Gratitude, Taking “B” Things With Gratitude, Taking “C” Things With Gratitude,Taking “D” Things With Gratitude, Taking “E” Things With Gratitude, Taking “F” Things With Gratitude, Taking “G” Things With Gratitude, Taking “H” Things With Gratitude, Taking “I” Things With Gratitude, Taking “J” Things With Gratitude,Taking “K” Things With Gratitude, Taking “L” Things With Gratitude, Taking “M” Things With Gratitude, Taking “N” Things With Gratitude, Taking “O” Things With Gratitude, Taking “P” Things With Gratitude, Taking “Q” Things With Gratitude, Taking “R” Things With Gratitude, Taking “S” Things With Gratitude, Taking “T” Things With Gratitude, Taking “U” Things With Gratitude

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Taking “U” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

For the rest of November, I’m going to take with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twenty-first day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “U” things.

I am especially grateful for:

Unexplained, unexpected, unexplored. I have always loved books that first lay out and then try to solve the riddles of this world. For example, the pyramids have been the epitome of mystery, yet there have been some wonderful SANYO DIGITAL CAMERAsolutions to the puzzle, my favorite (and the best explanation I have come across) is that they were generators, converting the earth’s energy into usable energy. (If you’ve read my novel Light Bringer, you will already know this.) I am grateful for all unexplained, unexpected, unexplored places and things in this world. They give us scope for imagination, and prove to us that not everything can be proved.

Unnoticed. By definition, we take for granted all those things in our lives that pass unnoticed. The world reflected in puddles. The flowering weed by the wayside. The machines that start up the first time. The appliances that quietly chug away unnoticed until something goes wrong. The people we pass on the street without a glass. The bare-limbed trees that are patiently awaiting spring for us to notice them. Today I will notice such things, and be grateful.

Uniqueness. In this homogenized society, where we seem to eat, dress, think alike, we need to celebrate our unique qualities, no matter how embarrassed we are by them or how annoying they are to others. So today, I will be taking uniqueness — yours and mine — with gratitude.

Utensils and other useful things. Every day we wield various utensils and other useful things without giving them a moment’s thought. Potato mashers, can openers, spoons, forks. So many wonderful bits and pieces that make our lives easier! Today, I won’t be taking such tools for granted, but will be taking them with gratitude.

So, what “U” things are you taking for gratitude today?

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See also:
Taking “A” Things With Gratitude, Taking “B” Things With Gratitude, Taking “C” Things With Gratitude,Taking “D” Things With Gratitude, Taking “E” Things With Gratitude, Taking “F” Things With Gratitude, Taking “G” Things With Gratitude, Taking “H” Things With Gratitude, Taking “I” Things With Gratitude, Taking “J” Things With Gratitude,Taking “K” Things With Gratitude, Taking “L” Things With Gratitude, Taking “M” Things With Gratitude, Taking “N” Things With Gratitude, Taking “O” Things With Gratitude, Taking “P” Things With Gratitude, Taking “Q” Things With Gratitude, Taking “R” Things With Gratitude, Taking “S” Things With Gratitude, Taking “T” Things With Gratitude

***

Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.

Taking “T” Things With Gratitude

When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude. ~~ G. K. Chesterton

For the rest of November, I’m going to take with gratitude some of those things I often take for granted — an entire alphabet’s worth! Since today is the twentienth day of this surge of gratitude, I am giving thanks for “T” things.

I am especially grateful for:

Tigers. I’ve never met a tiger outside of a zoo, and I’m not sure I’d ever want to meet one, but I’m grateful there are such creatures roaming free adding a bit of wildness to our increasingly tame world.

numbersTomorrow. Of all the things we take for granted, “tomorrow” is probably the one we most take for granted until something — a severe illness or the death of a loved one — reminds us that our tomorrows are gifts. One of the great joys in life is putting off until tomorrow what we should have or could have done today. And one of the great comforts in life is knowing that we can always try again tomorrow what we failed at today. So I will take with gratitude all my tomorrows.

Temperature control. Oh, the miracle of being able to change the inside temperature with the touch of a button or the flick of a switch! We take such luxury for granted (until the bill comes, that is) but it’s a great blessing to be warm on a cold day or cool on a hot day, and for this, I am grateful.

Taste. Considering that Thanksgiving feasting is only a few days away, I am especially grateful for the ability to taste. So what if I am going the easy way, simply fixing boxed stuffing, heating up rotisserie chicken, using bottled gravy, and canned cranberries. (There is no way I’m going to cook a full dinner for a 97-year-old man who would just as soon drink Ensure.) And anyway, the yams will be freshly baked. (No marshmallows or maple syrup, thank you very much.)

Thank you. “Thank you” seems to be disappearing from the world, especially the shopping world, replaced by a casual “there you go.” Eek. I never take “thank you” for granted, but I take all my “thank you”s with gratitude.

Toes. Without toes, we would have no balance, no grace. Even though my balance is poor and my grace often lacking, it’s not the fault of my toes, for which I am grateful.

So, what “T” things are you taking for gratitude today?

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See also:
Taking “A” Things With Gratitude, Taking “B” Things With Gratitude, Taking “C” Things With Gratitude,Taking “D” Things With Gratitude, Taking “E” Things With Gratitude, Taking “F” Things With Gratitude, Taking “G” Things With Gratitude, Taking “H” Things With Gratitude, Taking “I” Things With Gratitude, Taking “J” Things With Gratitude,Taking “K” Things With Gratitude, Taking “L” Things With Gratitude, Taking “M” Things With Gratitude, Taking “N” Things With Gratitude, Taking “O” Things With Gratitude, Taking “P” Things With Gratitude, Taking “Q” Things With Gratitude, Taking “R” Things With Gratitude, Taking “S” Things With Gratitude

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Pat Bertram is the author of the suspense novels Light Bringer, More Deaths Than One, A Spark of Heavenly Fire, and Daughter Am I. Bertram is also the author of Grief: The Great Yearning, “an exquisite book, wrenching to read, and at the same time full of profound truths.” Connect with Pat on Google+. Like Pat on Facebook.