It’s a good thing I don’t watch much television, otherwise I’d probably have a flat forehead from banging my head against the wall. The only reason I watch at all is that the woman I work for likes to watch Judge Judy, and so I watch with her.
I don’t really mind the show, even those I’ve seen a couple of times before, because they offer good object lessons such as: have written contracts that spell out exactly what is contracted for; don’t rent from shady characters; don’t rent to shady characters; don’t let other people drive your car; and always, always, have car insurance. It also shows the sense entitlement so many people have, though I already knew that. People will encroach and encroach and encroach on your space, and when you draw the line and say, “no further,” suddenly you’re a defendant in a case before Judge Judy.
What I do mind are the commercials. The idiocy drives me wild. For example, in a series of particularly annoying paper towel commercials, somehow something gets spilled. People scream, “Nooooooo,” and run to get this special paper towel to protect a precious item from getting damaged. None of these objects is immovable, so I sit there gritting my teeth and wonder why the fools don’t simply lift the laptop or lottery ticket or tablet or whatever out of the way of the spreading liquid.
Then there’s all the lawyer commercials. With sad faces, people talk about the bad vehicular accident they were in, and then suddenly they grin and say, “But these lawyers got me $210,000,” as if they’d won the lottery. It seems to me a bad imitation of a scene from the movie Office Space, where a character in a full-body cast from is throwing a party because he’s free from working now that he’s won a huge settlement. The scene wasn’t funny in the movie, and it isn’t funny in the commercials.
Speaking of happy — the myriad prescription drug commercials all show happy, happy people, dancing and laughing as a voiceover explains all the terrible side effects those very happy people are in danger of getting, side effect that are often worse than the ailment they are supposed to cure. (You’re constipated? Take this drug and you won’t have to worry about constipation anymore because you’ll have a heart attack or become arthritic or become comatose from a stroke.)
And what’s with those oh, so anal blue bears?
See why I prefer reading? No commercials!
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