Getting older is strange, to put it mildly. Watching one’s body slowly change and not for the better, feeling one’s energy deplete, wondering if simple memory loss such as not remembering a word is indicative of a more severe decline.
So far, none of those issues is that great a deal for me. I’ve learned to accept my mild infirmities — the joints that don’t always work well, the cough that lingers too long, the words that elude me. One thing I have not yet learned to interpret is what to do when I have no energy — should I take it easy? Or should I . . . not?
When I was younger and had bouts of enervation, I could contribute them to allergies (my allergies were more of an energy thing than typical upper respiratory symptoms), an incipient cold, or laziness. Most times I gave in to the malaise because if I didn’t, I’d usually get sick. And anyway, I was young enough to get back into the swing of things once the feebleness passed, so if I ended up indulging my laziness, it didn’t really matter.
Now there is a fourth possibility to add to the rest: If I lack energy, is it allergies, a low-grade cold, laziness, or is it old age? If it’s one of the first three, I can treat the enervation as I always do — take it easy and indulge my laziness. If, however, the enervation is due to old age feebleness, I certainly don’t want to give in to it. Barring an accident or illness, or any other life-threatening problem, I could possibly live another decade, perhaps even two, and if I give in to sluggishness too soon, that lack of activity would cause additional problems.
I suppose one way to tell would be if the enervation came on quickly or if the energy loss came slowly over a long period of time, but even then, I get used to ignoring discomfort, so perhaps I wouldn’t notice slow moving debilitation. Besides, I’ve always been a low energy person. Throughout my years I’ve often exercised, but it’s been a push rather than a natural inclination. That’s why I read so much — it doesn’t take much energy to sit and hold and book. Even letting my thoughts wander doesn’t take as much energy as letting my body wander.
Speaking of which, the snow is gone, but I still haven’t resumed my intention of walking every day. I’ve been dealing with a low energy time, and don’t want to create additional problems by walking against the very cold wind. Brrr!
In the end, I’ll do what I always do — stop thinking about why I feel lazy and just grab a book.
***
Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.










January 18, 2026 at 7:43 pm
Before he died, Cle insisted I get a dog. I have no choice no matter how I feel but to walk him 3-4 times a day. No matter what the weather is, out I go. So could be some of the flu I had and could be old age. I don’t dare stop long enought o find out.
January 19, 2026 at 8:14 am
I tried to pretend I had a dog and had to walk it a couple of times a day, but that didn’t work. I’m just glad I never got a dog for real.
January 19, 2026 at 4:19 pm
The best I can say is he is good company. As you well know I am someone who needs company loneliness is not my forte.
January 19, 2026 at 4:22 pm
And loneliness after losing that one person who made us “not lonely” can be a killer. Sometimes literally. I’m glad you have that company.
January 19, 2026 at 4:27 pm
Me too. Cle insisted I get a dog when he had never wanted one before. It was my Christmas present by Jan 24th he was in the hospital. On February 24 he died.
January 19, 2026 at 5:39 pm
Looking after you as best as he could.
January 20, 2026 at 4:25 pm
some how he knew. I don’t know how but he did. I am so blessed to have had him with me as long as I did. Ours was a late marriage and I believe we both enjoyed the love and companionship.
January 20, 2026 at 5:57 pm
I knew you were happy with him. It was good to see.
January 21, 2026 at 12:48 pm
Yes However, for me after the 1st experience, It has been difficult to continue to live w/o him.
January 21, 2026 at 1:19 pm
I can only imagine. It must be especially hard.
January 22, 2026 at 10:41 am
Learning, always learning. Praying, working, trying.