How Fast Time Flies

January 26, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
What do you complain about the most?
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I wasn’t going to answer this particular blog prompt because I don’t think I complain all that much. I suppose it’s possible I do complain at times to other people, and it might seem to them that I complain a lot, but since I spend most of my time alone, to me, those complaints seem few and far between. I do, however, tend to mention how fast time is passing, which could be construed a complaint.

January especially seems to skim by me with barely a nod to the passing days. By the middle of the month, I’m usually bemoaning the speed which the year is passing, and by the end of the month, I figure the year is all but done.

But not this year. This January seems interminably long. It feels as if the month should be over, and yet there’s still most of a week remaining. I don’t suppose it matters how fast the month seems to be passing except that it screws up with my internal clock. Also, I am trying to do a “dry January,” and having to be extra cognizant of what I eat is wearing on me.

[I learned of Dry January (a program started in the UK in 2013) from my sister who follows this program, and since I don’t drink, I decided to show my solidarity by eschewing sugar and wheat, with of course, the goal of trying to reset my metabolism and eating habits. (I always try to eat as healthy as I can, but I find as the year progresses, I slip more and more from my goal, and I wanted to give myself a good start to the new year.)]

I suppose my starting Dry January early (the day after Christmas) could be making the month seem longer, but the Christmas treats were gone, and so was the tree. (I wrapped the fully decorated fake tree in cushioning packing materials, stuck in in a heavy trash bag and took it down into the basement, ready to pull out for next year. It makes it so much easier to put up a tree when it’s already decorated!) So there was no reason to wait to start that particular resolution. But even given that I started the “dry” month early, there’s no reason for January to seem so long.

Oh, well. It will eventually be over, February will fly by, and I will soon be complaining again about fast time is passing.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in writing. Tags: , , , . 8 Comments »

Fun? Me?

January 22, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
List five things you do for fun.
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Five things I do for fun:

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

Yep, that’s right — I don’t do anything for fun, don’t even know how to have fun. Even as a kid, I didn’t know how to play let alone have fun. I used to like paper dolls, but after I did the work to cut out the clothes and tried them on the dolls, that was it. I never knew what to do with them afterward. I remember once I spent hours building a small town out of paper, complete with houses and streets, but since I didn’t know what to do with it, I let my younger siblings play with my creation while I sat and watched.

(Apparently, I was born with that trait. My mother often told the tale of baby me and how my eleven-month older brother would play with my toys, and as long as he stayed by my playpen so I could watch, I was content.)

To be honest, I don’t even know what fun is, so I had to look it up. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, fun is “light-hearted pleasure, enjoyment, or amusement; boisterous joviality or merrymaking; entertainment”.

Boisterous joviality and merrymaking are not part of my makeup. I am quiet, the one sitting back and letting other people get rowdy or drink too much or “party” (whatever that is). On my twenty-first birthday, I went to a bar in Central City with a friend for my first drink, but she dragged a friend of hers along. I sat and watched the two of them get raucously drunk. Finally, I went up to the bar and started talking to the owner. Even though he didn’t know it was my birthday, he seemed to feel sorry for me, especially as all I did was order a soft drink. At one point he asked me if I wanted to see his new icemaking machine and I said yes. I know what you think: “Hey, want to come up and see my etchings?” But no. He was thrilled with his new machine, and wanted to show it off. So typical of me! (Typical, too, that I had to drive those two drunks home, stopping periodically so they wouldn’t mess up by new car with their retching.)

I read a lot, but for me, reading is not a “light-hearted pleasure or enjoyment.” I’m not sure it’s even enjoyment. It’s more of a thing I do the in the same way I breathe — as a necessity, a mechanical act that keeps me alive, something that supports calm, and keeps me centered. It’s just what I do. Sometimes, if the book is not particularly stimulating, I let my conscious mind follow the story while my subconscious deals with whatever problems I might have, or even deconstructs the story to see what the author did.

I also like to learn, but that fits in with the whole “reading” thing.

As for entertainment: the last time I had a television (until I moved here to my permanent home, I rented a room in a house that came with a television), I decided to watch Hallmark movies. I figured I’d never spring for television programming, so it would be the last time I had a chance to watch those movies. So I did. But for me, it wasn’t entertaining so much as a study in how to put together a Hallmark movie. So much time for an introduction. So much time until the meeting. So much time for the characters to get to know each other. At exactly what time the big breakup/misunderstanding occurs. And finally how long for the happily ever after ending.

Despite being a rather quiet and serious person who spends most of her time alone, I still do like to laugh and chat with friends, but sometimes days pass without my seeing anyone, especially in winter. (Sometimes it takes more mental energy than I have to make the effort. Luckily, my friends make the effort for me.) In the summer, when I am out working in my yard (again, not really fun for me, though I do like seeing the results of my work) I often visit with neighbors across the fence, in the alley, or in the middle of the street depending on where those neighbors live.

A friend posted on her blog that instead of making New Year’s resolutions or intentions, she’d heard of a different way to start the year: pick a word to be a theme for that year. Sounds nice. Maybe I should choose “fun”?

But no, if resolutions tend to set us up for failure, then trying to live up to a word that is not in my nature would set me up for even more failure.

I suppose not being “fun-loving” is something I should worry about, but I’ve lived this long without being able to list five things I do for fun, so I suppose I can live my remaining years the same way. And anyway, I’m contented, which should count for something.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in being me, books, life. Tags: , , , , , , . 8 Comments »

Books I Want to Read

January 21, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
What books do you want to read?
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The books I want to read are novels with a new story (which is hard to find since it seems so many novels repeat the same old stories with minor variations) or a truly different twist on an old story. The characters in these new — or old — stories are loyal and kind, nice until it’s time not to be nice, have integrity, do their best and when they don’t succeed, try to do a better best in some way. Often these characters have a talent or skill, but the story challenges them in ways that those abilities don’t help, and in fact force them try to find ways to use their lesser abilities. (For a simplistic example, a person with great eyesight would be at a disadvantage in a lightless cave and would need to rely on their perhaps diminished hearing.)

These books are also all written with clarity and grace using words and phrases that are sometimes lyrical or out of the ordinary, but always clear and understandable.

The books are of various genres, but at their core they are all great stories with relatability and depth, a sense of wonder and perhaps a touch of strange. No category romance! And not much science fiction or fantasy, either. (A lot of fantasy starts out very confusing and quite frankly, I have enough trouble sorting out the confusion in the real world. I don’t need to bring more confusion into my life.) Some speculative fiction would be on the list of books I want to read, especially if the stories are rooted in an everyday world and only after the story is established does it branch off into extrapolated plausibility (or implausibility).

The books also keep me absorbed without nail-biting tension. Curiosity about what is happening is better for me since tension, like confusion, is something best left to the real world. In fact, if a book makes me too tense, I read the ending, and if the ending fulfills the author’s contract with the reader, giving a satisfying and fulfilling resolution (another thing that’s in all the books I want to read), I’ll go back and finish reading the book with a deeper understanding of the situation.

I’m sure there are other characteristics I’m looking for in the books I want to read, but for now, this will do.

Oh, you want the titles? If I knew the titles of such paragons of the written word, I’d have already read the books!

The truth is, although the books I want to read have all the elements I’ve just described, I read just about anything as long as it engages my attention enough to get through the first chapter. Besides, somewhere in all the sludge are gems just waiting to be found.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in books, fiction, life, writing. Tags: , , , , , . 11 Comments »

Pat In the Hat

January 20, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.
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A patrician during the Roman Empire was a person of noble birth, an aristocrat who had high social standing and owned a significant portion of wealth and land.

A plebian was everyone else — the ninety-five percent who did the work: farmers, merchants, laborers, crafts people, who had no rights and could not own land.

Eventually, the plebians managed to attain equal rights through protests and walkouts because a city could not survive, nor could a non-working aristocratic class survive when there were no workers to do the necessary tasks of keeping the armies marching, the cities clean, and the citizenry fed.

Still, throughout the centuries, those two words have held some sort of power. Although I was named after the patricians, I never felt “patrician.” I always considered myself to be plebian and my name ironic, though I am glad of the name “Pat.” I would not like being called “Plebe.”

Actually, I never really liked the name “Pat,” though I took that version of my name as an author name since it seemed to have a nice strong sound and connotation. I also used the name to introduce myself to new acquaintances, partly to help them find me online but mostly because I didn’t like giving my real name to strangers. (It felt as if I were giving too much of myself to people I didn’t know and perhaps would never see again.) When I was mostly nomadic, this pseudo-name didn’t matter. It only became a problem when strangers became friends, or when online connections became offline friends, and by then it was too late to change names.

My writing career, such as it was, has all but disappeared, so what I call myself doesn’t really matter, but it was the name I’d used for so long, that it seems convenient to keep it. The truth is, I no longer know what my real name is. Or if I have one. I spend so much time by myself, that there’s no need of a name. I just . . . am. (I once wanted to learn the names of birds; then it dawned on me that the names of birds were names we gave them, not the names they gave themselves, so it seemed rather a silly project. If you can’t learn the truth from the inside out, then looking from the outside in didn’t seem to gain much.)

A week or so ago, when I had just loaded groceries in my car, I heard someone call out, “Pat!” Since I didn’t associate the name with myself, it took me a moment to realize that a good friend was calling me from across the parking lot. (I recognized her voice before I realized who she was talking to.)

So, until I discover my real name, “Pat” is fine. Besides, to distinguish me from all the other Pats in this town — at least a half dozen of us — people identify me as “Pat in the Hat,” which is kind of cute. And accurate.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in being me, history/myth, life. Tags: , , , , , , . 7 Comments »

Uninventing

January 18, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
If you could un-invent something, what would it be?
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I spent a lot of time thinking about this question because it seems as if there should be things in our lives that need uninventing, but I can’t think of any. There are a lot of things that have far reaching ramifications that I don’t like, such as generative artificial intelligence, but since it’s a direct result of computers and the internet, if it was un-invented, it would simply be reinvented.

There are things I don’t like, of course, but I try to stay away from them. It’s easy enough to do, most of the time. Keep the computer off, put the phone on airplane mode (as I do at night since no one is depending on me, and even if there were, there is nothing I could do about it that late anyway), don’t read books published after 2022 unless I’m familiar with the author.

Even though in some form, artificial intelligence has been around since the 1960s, models for the public like ChatGPT weren’t released until late 2022, and it seems as if the writing world has gobbled up the technology. People like that they can write a book in a day! Yay! Well, yay for them, not for me. I read to connect with the author’s view of the world, to find perhaps more depth to my own world. Connecting with artificial intelligence would not be the same thing at all. I’m sure, with time, generative AI will master even the complexity of human thought and emotions, developing novels that have layers to them, but I’m not interested.

Actually, I’m not interested in most authors who were first published in the past ten or fifteen years. There seems to be an underlying nastiness to so many of them, with unreliable characters lying in their own POV about what they did and about other characters, so the reader doesn’t know and can’t guess how appalling the unreliable character is until the end when you find out they were the bad guy all along. Eek. I don’t know if this is the sort of story new writers prefer or if it’s what editors are looking for, but either way, I don’t like being left with a feeling of squalor, as if there’s a thin film of filth on my soul.

But I am getting away from the point of what I would uninvent — nothing. On the other hand, if I could get rid of some policies, that I would gladly do.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in culture, internet, life, writing. Tags: , , , , , , . 8 Comments »

Comfortable Clutter

January 16, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
Where can you reduce clutter in your life?
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The easiest place for me to reduce clutter in my life right now is to clear up my desk and worktable. Except for my office, where I spend most of my time, I keep surfaces free from clutter. I was always sort of messy, never really having the energy to do a lot of cleaning, but ever since I moved into my own house, I’ve kept everything neat and clutter-free. I like the clean lines — no photos or pictures on the walls, nothing but lamps on the side tables, books in their proper place, kitchen counters bare. I also like that people can drop by without my getting embarrassed by my lack of housekeeping skills.

My cupboards are full of kitchenware and other necessities, but I make sure that whenever I get new items, instead of further cluttering those cabinets, I get rid of an equal number of older items.

I have a lot of boxes of things stored in my garage, but they’re not exactly clutter, at least not according to the definition of clutter as being a disorganized mess — my garage is neatly organized. Still, there are many things, maybe even most things, that I will get rid of, but not yet. Too often in my life, I’ve disposed of various items, particularly materials and tools for a special project, and then later had to buy those items again. There’s a good chance I won’t use most of what I have since my project days seem to be over, but I don’t know for sure, so there the boxes sit. And anyway, the would-be clutter is out of the house so I don’t have to think about or stumble on boxes of stuff. It does help that I got rid of about half of what we owned when Jeff died and I moved in with my father, and another significant portion when my father died and once again, I had to move on. I am clearing the rest out gradually, but at the rate I’m going, I’ll be one hundred and ten by the time everything is gone, but oh, please! Don’t make me live that long!

Mental clutter is pretty much the same, with any possible issues either left in the past, neatly stored away for easy retrieval, or dumped here on this blog.

So am I going to clear up the clutter on my desk? Probably not. Everything I need is right at hand, and if there is too much clutter, well, it’s comfortable clutter, not an embarrassing mess.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in blogging, house, life. Tags: , , , , , , , . 13 Comments »

Ten-Year Anniversary of My Road Trip

January 13, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
Think back on your most memorable road trip.
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It’s odd to think that my cross-country road trip was ten years ago! It doesn’t seem that so much time has passed, and yet, I’ve lived what seems a lifetime since then — moving (both into a new location and out of grief), becoming a first-time homeowner, landscaping the yard, meeting new people and making new friends.

Despite the vast change in my life during the past years, I never had any problems adjusting to anything that happened to me probably because of all the traveling that had gone before — the twenty-one week cross-country trip, the longitudinal trips, the half-cross-country trips (from California to Colorado). I really enjoyed all those trips, but now, I’m just as glad to stay home. (Though I tend to think part of that is not wanting to drive my geriatric car too much anymore. I shudder at times to think of my traveling solo all over the country in my ancient VW bug. I made it safely, but I’m not sure I want to test my luck.)

There was so much to see and do on all of my trips, but the most memorable one has to be that cross-country trip. I was out there by myself, doing what I wanted, going where I wanted, camping when I could, staying in motels when I needed to, visiting friends. Most of those friends were people I’d met online, and I was amazed and honored by how well they treated me, taking me to see the special sights and sites in their area. I experienced more of the continental USA during that time than I had in all my previous years.

Lucky for me, even though I do remember the trip, I don’t have to. I documented my travels, from the first hesitant raising of my first tent to the final feeling of loss at finding myself the same at the end as I was at the beginning.

And lucky for you, you can experience my trip for yourself by clicking on this link: Road Trip 2016.

Safe travels wherever you go!

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in Adventure, home, life. Tags: , , , , , , , . 4 Comments »

Saved by the Snow

January 12, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
What snack would you eat right now?
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It’s too bad that snack foods are so dangerously unhealthy, otherwise I could live on packaged snacks — crunchy, salty, cheesy, sweet, easily available, no cooking, no dishes — yep, sounds good! Despite that convenience, I don’t often eat foods normally labeled as “snack,” though in a way, everything I eat is a snack since one of the definitions of snack is “a very small meal,” and I seldom eat a large meal. (Unless it’s one of those rare occasions I visit a Chinese restaurant.)

Still, I have created a few snacks for myself, such as peanuts and chocolate chips or walnuts and raisins. Or best of all, dried oranges drizzled with dark chocolate. Yum.

But that’s not the question. The question is what snack I would have right now. Considering that I am limiting sugar intake this month (except for honey in my tea), as well as staying away from grains, my choices are limited. So what would I eat right? Probably a hamburger patty topped with cheese. Or perhaps the last of my Christmas gift summer sausage with a few pickle chips. Or even a little tuna salad.

What a boring food life I lead!

Luckily, I read a lot and can vicariously enjoy many delicious snacks through the characters. Though, come to think of it, too many women characters sigh and moan when eating something special as if they were having a sexual experience, and that’s not something I would ever do. Food is just . . . food. I suppose eating is a sensual experience (well, of course it is — taste is a sense) but considering how I have limited my diet, eating, even snacking, is more about staving off hunger than anything else.

But now this blog prompt has got me thinking about ice cream and chocolate and cheesy snacks. Resolutions are meant to be broken, right? It’s a good thing the roads are too slick for me to drive, otherwise I’d forget my healthy intentions and head out to the store. Whew! Saved by the snow.

Of course, I cook bake something, brownies, perhaps, but no. Too much work. It’s easier to stick to my resolution.

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in life. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , . 8 Comments »

The Glad Game

January 10, 2026 — Pat Bertram
Daily writing prompt
Describe an item you were incredibly attached to as a youth. What became of it?
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Books have always been a part of my life, so it’s no wonder a few of the items I remember from my childhood were my books, all hand-me downs from my much older cousin. It’s possible they were even handed down to her, because they were old by the time I got them. Most I remember reading, but have no clear memory of author or title except for the Judy Bolton mysteries and a boxed set of five vintage Pollyanna books.

Whenever I got sick, I used to read those books. I must have been sick a lot since I read those books dozens of times. I gave away most of the books when I grew up, but I kept the Pollyanna books for years. A friend had once asked for them, and when I needed to downsize, I gave them to her. I have no idea what has happened to them since, but a single early edition of the Pollyanna books is worth about $2,000, which means the set would be worth a small fortune.

I can’t actually say I was incredibly attached to those Pollyanna books because obviously, I did give them away at some point. But no matter where they are now, and whatever they are worth today, all I know is that when I was a child, sick in bed, they were priceless.

Oddly, I was never enamored of her glad game — I could never see the point of being glad one didn’t need crutches when one wanted a doll (but oh, the irony that she ended up needing crutches after all!) — but I will play the game this once. I was very glad of those books!

Is there something you once were glad to have owned?

***

Pat Bertram is the author of Grief: The Inside Story – A Guide to Surviving the Loss of a Loved One.

Posted in books, life. Tags: , , , , , . 4 Comments »
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